Macdara assumes that everyone litigates repeatedly certain arguments that they may once have had, or that they wish to have had. Now that he has his own small corner of the Internet within which to hold forth, Macdara asks the reader to bear with him while he returns to a repugnant episode from the Brexit Wars. 

In a sense it is unfair to pick on this particular person, renowned as she is for her stupidity. But since she will never read these words, in the first place because this is an obscure Site, and in the second place, because she would not be able to follow Macdara’s lengthy sentences, your correspondent will persevere. 

Priti Patel: your idea to starve Ireland into submission during the Brexit negotiations was an insult to the Irish people, clearly, but also an insult to the collective intelligence of Humankind. 

This lady imagined that the food transported to Ireland through the land bridge of England and Wales could be blocked from making its way to Ireland, and that in desperation we would comply with whatever the English Government’s wishes were. Let us try to be brief in responding to this phantasy. 

One, if the UK Government held up food delivery such that it all rotted waiting at the roadside somewhere in England or Wales, the companies responsible would quickly stop sending food to Ireland that way. Two, they would make use of the many direct freight routes into Ireland by sea—substantially augmented following the Brexit vote in order to prepare for the coming chaos in the neighbouring jurisdiction—or by air. Three, Ireland is a major food exporter, producing enough food to feed the population several times over; we would not in fact have starved. 

Four, Ireland is the UK’s sixth-largest trading partner: the Damage that Patel’s policy would give rise to would be with regards to this trading relationship, rather than the putative damage to the health of the Irish people; much of Ireland’s foot output is of course exported to the neighbouring island, which is highly dependent on food imports. Five, the English Government should realise that the Irish are their greatest allies in the EU; Macdara would favour a more combative approach, even if it led to a closed Border for the brief time remaining to the Northern State, but the Dublin Government, made up of arch-Partionists, is far keener on placating the English authorities and has long been visibly uncomfortable at having to disagree with London. Six, the English have tried to starve us into submission previously and should shut the fuck up if they feel inclined to do so again, to which we might add that the policy having been such a success in Ireland, they tried it elsewhere too on an even larger scale, including in the area of the world from which Patel’s family originated. 

Seven, it occurs to Macdara that the English administration might reflect on how their roads are being worn down through use as a land bridge; English and Welsh communities are subject to the impacts of pollution from these lorries, with little benefit: one might think that the London Government would be more exercised about this as a reason for preventing goods destined for Ireland from passing through. 

Priti, if it has transpired somehow that you are reading, I know seven is a big number: just work on understanding any one of the reasons above, each one is good enough on its own. Number six is the key one.